SKU:10226361099973492559
This product is print-on-demand and therefore is non-refundable.
Ensure secure transactions and peace of mind with our trusted payment methods. Your safety is our priority, we employ advanced security measures to protect your personal information and sensitive data.
Santa keeps the best stock under his coat, and he’s only open for business once a year. Our I Only Get My Baubles Out Once a Year funny Christmas jumper shows him in a lamp-lit arched shop window strung with fairy lights, with snow falling on the street behind. Fully dressed, thank goodness, Santa throws his long red coat wide open like a dodgy market trader, and the lining is hung with rows and rows of shiny, colourful baubles. I ONLY GET MY curves over the top in white, BAUBLES fills a red ribbon in huge yellow letters, and OUT ONCE A YEAR finishes the line on a green banner. It’s an innuendo Christmas jumper that flashes nothing but tinsel.
The print is large, bright and full colour, with a thick black outline that keeps every bauble shining on all 11 colours: red, purple, navy, royal blue, charcoal, Irish green, forest green, maroon, sport grey, black and white. Unveil it at the office Christmas party, on Christmas Jumper Day or on the Christmas pub crawl, and let the crowd decide which baubles you meant. It makes a cracking Secret Santa gift for the show-off in your life, the friend who loves a big reveal, or the colleague who’s been waiting all year for an excuse. Of all the funny Christmas jumpers in our range, this is the one that opens with a flourish.
Is it rude? A little, but only in your head: everything on the jumper is a Christmas decoration. That’s the trick behind the best rude Christmas jumpers and rude Xmas jumpers, and why this ranks among our funniest Xmas jumpers and hilarious Christmas jumpers. It’s cheeky without being an offensive Christmas jumper, though our offensive Xmas jumpers, inappropriate Christmas jumpers and inappropriate Xmas jumpers are there for anyone who wants to go further, alongside plenty of funny Xmas jumpers for the whole team. Every order helps a good cause, too, because part of our profits goes to mental-health charities. Choose your colour and size, add it to your basket and order early to beat the Christmas rush. Once a year is plenty.
Product features
Care instructions
EU representative: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY
Product information: Gildan 18000, two year warranty in the EU and Northern Ireland
Warnings, Hazard: For adults
Care instructions: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), Non-chlorine: bleach as needed, Tumble dry: low heat, Do not iron, Do not dryclean
Shipping Destinations:
Shipping Methods & Rates (excluding Funny T-shirts, Sweatshirt & Hoodies):
You’ve got two options at checkout:
FREE Next Day Delivery on orders over £50 (Mainland UK only)
Handling Time:
Tracking Your Order:
Once your order’s on its way, you’ll get a DHL tracking number with all the bells and whistles:
Packaging:
Shipping Insurance:
Return & Exchange Policy:
Damaged Shipments:
Contact Us:
Updates and Notifications:
You’ll get:
⚠️ Print on Demand (T-shirts, Sweatshirts & Hoodies)
Print on demand products work differently to the rest of our range. They're made to order and fulfilled globally, making them the only Shit Shirt Club product we ship internationally.
Please allow approximately 2–7 business days for production, plus the delivery time shown at checkout. These are estimates and may vary depending on the season, product availability, and order size.
Please note that delivery times are estimates only and are not guaranteed. If your order takes longer than the estimated timeframe, we're still unable to offer a refund or return, as Stag Tees are non-refundable and non-returnable made-to-order items. If you need your tee for a specific event, please allow plenty of time when placing your order.
Please allow up to 15 business days from placing the order to receive your product.
Thank you for choosing Shit Shirt Club. Happy shopping!
Introduction:
At Shit Shirt Club, we pride ourselves on delivering the most vibrant, attention-grabbing shirts and men’s co-ord sets designed to be conversation starters, both in style and as a beacon for mental health awareness. We understand that shopping online is different from in-person experiences, so we’ve crafted a Returns & Refunds Policy that upholds both UK law and our commitment to customer satisfaction.
Your Right to Cancel and Return:
As per the UK’s distance selling regulations, you have the right to notify us within 14 days of receiving your goods if you wish to cancel your order. Following this notification, you’ll have an additional 14 days to return the items to us. No reason is necessary, and we respect your decision.
Conditions for Returns:
Processing Your Refund:
Upon receipt of the returned items and after verifying their condition, we will initiate the refund process. Kindly allow up to 14 working days from the date we receive the returned items for your refund to be processed. As a company dedicated to championing mental health, we appreciate your patience and understanding.
How to Return Your Items:
Exclusions:
Please understand that we reserve the right to refuse returns and refunds if the conditions stated above are not met. This policy is designed in accordance with UK law and to ensure the best possible experience for all of our cherished customers.
⚠️ Print on demand T-shirts, hoodies & sweatshirts (Made to Order)
Our print on demand range is made to order especially for you. Because these aren’t stocked or mass produced they fall under the “made to order” exception in UK consumer law.
That means we don’t accept returns or offer refunds for these items if you change your mind order the wrong size or realise your nan might see the photos
We’ll still sort you out if something arrives damaged defective or not as described.
Please check the size guide carefully and triple check your order before confirming. Once it’s in the system we can't recall it. The printers are fast furious and allergic to second chances.
Questions & Concerns:
Our team is always here to assist. Should you have any questions regarding our Returns & Refunds Policy, or any other inquiries, please contact us at info@shitshirt.club. Your peace of mind is paramount to us, and we’re here to help every step of the way.
Check Out My Balls Funny Christmas Jumper
Jingle My Bells and I'll Guarantee a White Christmas Funny Christmas Jumper
Balls Deep in Christmas Spirit Funny Christmas Jumper
Why Is Santa's Sack So Big? He Only Comes Once a Year Funny Christmas Jumper
Well Hung Stocking Funny Christmas Jumper
Hands Off My Puddings Funny Christmas Jumper
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Ensure secure transactions and peace of mind with our trusted payment methods. Your safety is our priority, we employ advanced security measures to protect your personal information and sensitive data.
Santa keeps the best stock under his coat, and he’s only open for business once a year. Our I Only Get My Baubles Out Once a Year funny Christmas jumper shows him in a lamp-lit arched shop window strung with fairy lights, with snow falling on the street behind. Fully dressed, thank goodness, Santa throws his long red coat wide open like a dodgy market trader, and the lining is hung with rows and rows of shiny, colourful baubles. I ONLY GET MY curves over the top in white, BAUBLES fills a red ribbon in huge yellow letters, and OUT ONCE A YEAR finishes the line on a green banner. It’s an innuendo Christmas jumper that flashes nothing but tinsel.
The print is large, bright and full colour, with a thick black outline that keeps every bauble shining on all 11 colours: red, purple, navy, royal blue, charcoal, Irish green, forest green, maroon, sport grey, black and white. Unveil it at the office Christmas party, on Christmas Jumper Day or on the Christmas pub crawl, and let the crowd decide which baubles you meant. It makes a cracking Secret Santa gift for the show-off in your life, the friend who loves a big reveal, or the colleague who’s been waiting all year for an excuse. Of all the funny Christmas jumpers in our range, this is the one that opens with a flourish.
Is it rude? A little, but only in your head: everything on the jumper is a Christmas decoration. That’s the trick behind the best rude Christmas jumpers and rude Xmas jumpers, and why this ranks among our funniest Xmas jumpers and hilarious Christmas jumpers. It’s cheeky without being an offensive Christmas jumper, though our offensive Xmas jumpers, inappropriate Christmas jumpers and inappropriate Xmas jumpers are there for anyone who wants to go further, alongside plenty of funny Xmas jumpers for the whole team. Every order helps a good cause, too, because part of our profits goes to mental-health charities. Choose your colour and size, add it to your basket and order early to beat the Christmas rush. Once a year is plenty.
Product features
Care instructions
EU representative: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY
Product information: Gildan 18000, two year warranty in the EU and Northern Ireland
Warnings, Hazard: For adults
Care instructions: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), Non-chlorine: bleach as needed, Tumble dry: low heat, Do not iron, Do not dryclean
Shipping Destinations:
Shipping Methods & Rates (excluding Funny T-shirts, Sweatshirt & Hoodies):
You’ve got two options at checkout:
FREE Next Day Delivery on orders over £50 (Mainland UK only)
Handling Time:
Tracking Your Order:
Once your order’s on its way, you’ll get a DHL tracking number with all the bells and whistles:
Packaging:
Shipping Insurance:
Return & Exchange Policy:
Damaged Shipments:
Contact Us:
Updates and Notifications:
You’ll get:
⚠️ Print on Demand (T-shirts, Sweatshirts & Hoodies)
Print on demand products work differently to the rest of our range. They're made to order and fulfilled globally, making them the only Shit Shirt Club product we ship internationally.
Please allow approximately 2–7 business days for production, plus the delivery time shown at checkout. These are estimates and may vary depending on the season, product availability, and order size.
Please note that delivery times are estimates only and are not guaranteed. If your order takes longer than the estimated timeframe, we're still unable to offer a refund or return, as Stag Tees are non-refundable and non-returnable made-to-order items. If you need your tee for a specific event, please allow plenty of time when placing your order.
Please allow up to 15 business days from placing the order to receive your product.
Thank you for choosing Shit Shirt Club. Happy shopping!
Introduction:
At Shit Shirt Club, we pride ourselves on delivering the most vibrant, attention-grabbing shirts and men’s co-ord sets designed to be conversation starters, both in style and as a beacon for mental health awareness. We understand that shopping online is different from in-person experiences, so we’ve crafted a Returns & Refunds Policy that upholds both UK law and our commitment to customer satisfaction.
Your Right to Cancel and Return:
As per the UK’s distance selling regulations, you have the right to notify us within 14 days of receiving your goods if you wish to cancel your order. Following this notification, you’ll have an additional 14 days to return the items to us. No reason is necessary, and we respect your decision.
Conditions for Returns:
Processing Your Refund:
Upon receipt of the returned items and after verifying their condition, we will initiate the refund process. Kindly allow up to 14 working days from the date we receive the returned items for your refund to be processed. As a company dedicated to championing mental health, we appreciate your patience and understanding.
How to Return Your Items:
Exclusions:
Please understand that we reserve the right to refuse returns and refunds if the conditions stated above are not met. This policy is designed in accordance with UK law and to ensure the best possible experience for all of our cherished customers.
⚠️ Print on demand T-shirts, hoodies & sweatshirts (Made to Order)
Our print on demand range is made to order especially for you. Because these aren’t stocked or mass produced they fall under the “made to order” exception in UK consumer law.
That means we don’t accept returns or offer refunds for these items if you change your mind order the wrong size or realise your nan might see the photos
We’ll still sort you out if something arrives damaged defective or not as described.
Please check the size guide carefully and triple check your order before confirming. Once it’s in the system we can't recall it. The printers are fast furious and allergic to second chances.
Questions & Concerns:
Our team is always here to assist. Should you have any questions regarding our Returns & Refunds Policy, or any other inquiries, please contact us at info@shitshirt.club. Your peace of mind is paramount to us, and we’re here to help every step of the way.
Check Out My Balls Funny Christmas Jumper
Jingle My Bells and I'll Guarantee a White Christmas Funny Christmas Jumper
Balls Deep in Christmas Spirit Funny Christmas Jumper
Why Is Santa's Sack So Big? He Only Comes Once a Year Funny Christmas Jumper
Well Hung Stocking Funny Christmas Jumper
Hands Off My Puddings Funny Christmas Jumper
Enjoy free tracked UK delivery on every Shit Shirt Club order over fifty pounds.
A large portion of profits funds UK mental health charities with every order.
Printed just for you, so nothing sits in a warehouse waiting to be binned.
Every shit jumper ships in 100 percent recycled, planet friendly packaging as standard.
Prints so shit they spark smiles, compliments and proper conversations that matter.
Rated Excellent on Trustpilot by thousands of happy, badly dressed legends.
A medium-heavy 271 gsm cotton and polyester blend that keeps you warm all December.
Knitted in one tube with no side seams, for a cleaner fit and less fabric waste.
A ribbed knit collar, cuffs and waistband that spring back and hold their shape.
Double-needle stitching at the key seams, so it survives every Christmas do going.
A classic unisex fit that is true to size, from S up to 4XL depending on colour.
Ink printed straight into the fabric, so every shit print stays bright and soft.
Every shit jumper you wear does more than get a laugh. Shit Shirt Club was built to get people talking about mental health, using loud, unapologetic clothing to break a silence that costs far too many people far too much. When someone at the Christmas party asks where you got that jumper, that small conversation can be the start of something much bigger.
That is why a large portion of every sale goes straight to mental health charities across the UK, helping fund real support for the people who need it. So when you pick your favourite funny Christmas jumper, you are not just buying the worst jumper at the party. You are backing a cause that matters, and helping make mental health easier to talk about, one shit jumper at a time.
Every Shit Shirt Club Christmas jumper is printed on the Gildan 18000 Heavy Blend crewneck sweatshirt, one of the most trusted blanks in the printing business. It is a medium-heavy 271 gsm fabric made from a 50/50 blend of cotton and polyester, so it is soft on the inside, warm enough for a December night out and smooth enough on the front to carry a big, bright print. It is knitted as one tube with no side seams for a cleaner fit, finished with a ribbed collar, cuffs and waistband that hold their shape, and double stitched at the key seams so it survives the office party, the family get-together and the walk home. In short, it is a proper sweatshirt that just happens to carry a very shit joke.
Yes. Our Christmas jumpers are true to size with a classic unisex fit, so most people order their normal size and are happy with it. The cut is comfortable rather than slim, with enough room to layer a shirt underneath without looking like you borrowed it from your dad. If you are between sizes, or you want a looser, cosier look for the sofa on Boxing Day, go one size up. If you prefer a neater fit under a coat, stick with your usual size. The size guide on this page lists the width, length and sleeve length for every size, so the safest move is to measure a sweatshirt you already own and love, then match it to the chart. These are printed to order, so getting it right first time matters.
Our Christmas jumpers come in sizes S to 4XL, and every colour is available from S to XL. Black, navy, red, sport grey and white go all the way up to 4XL. Royal blue and Irish green go up to 3XL, charcoal, forest green and purple go up to 2XL, and maroon stops at XL. If a size shows as unavailable, it is not made in that colour, so pick another colour and it will appear. Sizes are shared by everyone rather than split into men's and women's ranges. If you are buying for the whole office or a group of mates, collect everyone's size before you order rather than guessing, because printed to order items cannot be swapped for a change of mind.
They are unisex, cut on a classic straight body that suits everyone. Plenty of women wear ours exactly as they come and love the relaxed, slightly oversized look, especially with leggings or jeans for a festive night out. If you prefer something closer to the body, order one size down from your usual and it will sit neater through the shoulders and chest. If you want the full cosy, baggy look, order your normal size or go up. The size guide on this page lists the width, length and sleeve length for every size, so measure a jumper you already like and match the numbers. There is no separate men's or women's range, just one gloriously shit Christmas jumper.
Each jumper is a 50% cotton and 50% polyester blend at a medium-heavy 271 gsm, which gives you the softness of cotton with the warmth, strength and shape of polyester. The cotton is ethically grown in the United States, and the dyes are OEKO-TEX STANDARD 100 certified, so the fabric has been tested for harmful substances. The smooth face of the fabric is what lets the artwork print so sharply, while the blend helps the jumper keep its shape wash after wash. The white jumper is a natural white, so it can look slightly off-white next to a bright white shirt. In short, it is a warm, well made sweatshirt that feels good on and prints beautifully.
Keep it simple and your jumper will be ready for next Christmas, and the one after that. Machine wash cold at a maximum of 30C, use non-chlorine bleach only if you really need it, and tumble dry on low heat. Do not iron and do not dry clean, because both will damage the print. Our tip is to turn the jumper inside out before it goes in the machine, which keeps the print away from the drum and other people's zips. Wash it with similar colours and skip the fabric softener, which builds up on printed areas over time. A cool wash and a low dry will keep the fabric soft, the colours bright and the artwork looking exactly as shit as the day it arrived.
Not if you look after it. Every design is printed direct to garment, which puts the ink into the fibres of the fabric rather than leaving it sitting on top as a thick plastic layer. That means the print moves with the jumper, stays soft to the touch and does not crack or peel away the way old school transfers do. There is no heavy vinyl patch to lift at the corners, and nothing stiff across your chest when you sit down for Christmas dinner. Wash cold, tumble dry low, skip the iron and the dry cleaner, and your shit print will still be turning heads long after the party it was bought for.
As early as you can. Every jumper is printed just for you after you order, which is how we can offer this many designs, colours and sizes without warehouses full of jumpers nobody wanted. It also means production takes a little longer than an off the shelf item, so allow 3 to 5 working days from placing your order to it landing on your doormat. That covers production and delivery together, not one and then the other. You will get a tracking link as soon as it leaves the print floor. December is the busiest month of the year for printers and couriers alike, so if you need it for a work do, a Christmas jumper day or a party on a set date, give yourself more room than that rather than cutting it fine.
Because your jumper is printed to order specially for you, we cannot accept change of mind returns or exchanges on printed items, including ordering the wrong size. That is standard across print to order clothing, and it is exactly why we put a full size guide on every product page. Please check the measurements before you order, and if you are torn between two sizes, go up. If your jumper arrives faulty, damaged or is not what you ordered, that is a different story entirely. Get in touch within 14 days of receiving it with a photo and we will sort a replacement or a refund and cover the return postage.
Both. The jumper is made with ethically grown US cotton and OEKO-TEX STANDARD 100 certified dyes, and because it is printed to order, there is no dead stock heading for landfill after Christmas. It ships in 100 percent recycled packaging. On top of all that, a large portion of every sale goes to mental health charities here in the UK. Christmas is not easy for everyone, and Shit Shirt Club exists to get people talking about mental health. A very shit Christmas jumper turns out to be a very good excuse to start. When someone asks where you got it, that conversation can matter far more than the jumper.
